Let’s be real: homeschooling a teenager who flat-out hates school can shake even the most confident parent.
Maybe your once-curious kid now drags their feet through every assignment. The eye-rolls are on autopilot, every subject is “pointless,” and your peaceful homeschool day has turned into a battlefield. You’ve poured your heart into planning, pivoting, praying… and still, nothing’s working.
If you’re here, reading this with a mix of frustration, guilt, and burnout—you’re not alone. And no, you’re not failing. This is a moment, not the whole story.
Let’s talk about what to do next.
1. Take a Breath (and a Break)
When tensions are high, sometimes the most productive thing you can do is… pause. Take a full day—or even a week—to reset. Call it a “mental health break,” a “planning week,” or simply “recalibration.” Step away from the curriculum and focus on connection, not correction.
You don’t have to make any big decisions when emotions are raw. Give space for everyone to decompress and reflect.
2. Get Curious, Not Combative
Ask questions—not in interrogation mode, but with genuine curiosity:
- “What part of school feels hardest right now?”
- “What do you wish your day looked like?”
- “What do you think the point of school is?”
You might be surprised. Often what sounds like rebellion is actually discouragement, anxiety, or a sense of purposelessness.
3. Redefine What “Counts” as Learning
If your teen is into gaming, filmmaking, social media, coding, or even car mechanics—that’s learning. If they’re devouring books but hating math, lean into that strength while you figure out a different math approach.
Consider:
- Interest-led unit studies
- Project-based learning
- Entrepreneurship or real-world courses
- Trade skills or job shadowing
- Dual credit or online electives
This doesn’t mean giving up structure. It means adapting it to your teen’s wiring and the real world they’ll step into.
4. Revisit Your “Why”—Together
Your homeschool “why” probably evolved since you started. It’s okay to sit down with your teen and say, “I want this to work for both of us. What’s most important to you for your future? How can we shape school around that?”
When teens feel a sense of ownership, they’re more likely to engage—even if school never becomes their favorite thing.
5. Don’t Be Afraid to Quit the Wrong Thing
Quitting isn’t always failure—it’s sometimes wisdom. If a curriculum is sucking the life out of your homeschool, drop it. If a co-op is causing more stress than support, it’s okay to leave. If your teen’s current path isn’t working, it’s not too late to find a better fit.
You’re not quitting homeschooling—you’re quitting what’s not working so you can find what will.
6. Lean on Your Community
Whether it’s an online support group, a trusted friend, or a coach—don’t isolate. Others have walked this road. There’s power in hearing, “Me too.” You’re not the first parent who has cried over transcripts or doubted everything at 2AM.
(Hint: If you’re looking for a fresh start with support, check out our fillable homeschool transcript template or our step-by-step course on high school planning!)
Final Thought: This Is a Chapter, Not the Ending
Homeschooling through the teen years can feel like an emotional rollercoaster—but it’s also a front-row seat to transformation. Don’t lose sight of the bigger picture. You’re raising a future adult, not just checking boxes.
Even if today was hard—especially if today was hard—you’re doing sacred work.
And hey, we’re in this together.
Love,
Lisa
Lisa Nehring and her husband, Dr. David Nehring, a Clinical Psychologist, and Biblical Scholar speak together on a wide variety of topics, including education, classical education, vision, mission, parenting, marriage, and more.
- What to Do When Your Teen Hates School (And You’re Ready to Quit) - April 10, 2025
- Book Recommendations You are Gonna Love! with Katie Berry - March 10, 2025
- Pivot Your Homeschool (Flash Giveaway) - January 8, 2025
